Settlement, Separation, Sorrow and Saddam Hussein

What a funny name for a post? - Yeah, I know.

So what's the story behind this?

Well, I was sitting in church yesterday; sort of half paying attention and thinking about all that's transpired these past few days. The flooring and more of the supplies / things to be installed; have come into the habitat house. I've talked to the lawyer and they've heard back from those parties they need to hear from in order to get the settlement money situation squared away. (That will be coming real soon here.) So things are moving along and I'm excited.

OK, so what's this have to do with Saddam?

Sounds strange, yeah I know; but I was remembering the day the US military found him. I can still see the news reports; American soldiers pulling him out of this little hole he was hiding in. I remember sitting there watching this, thinking to myself of oh how happy I was going to be when they finally caught him. (Not that I wasn't happy; because I was.) I had a rather unexpected reaction to it though. Where as I thought I'd be jumping for joy that this regime was finally over and the people of Iraq could move on to something different and hopefully better; instead though, I found myself crying.

Pent up emotion for the years of profound suffering this man caused for whole groups of people. The lives he affected. Even of people like me, who'd never lived in his country. It was finally over and probably along with a lot of people in Iraq who cried for the exact same reason; I cried with them. It seemed like a strange reaction at the time; but I get it now.

So, just like my crying over Saddam Hussein; I'm sitting in church crying over these things that are soon to come to pass in my own life. Crying over moving out, moving on and starting over. I'm relieved, saddened, and profoundly disappointed in the failure of this marriage. After 9 years of embittered impasses and mounting resentments; what other choice have I got but to cut him loose and let him go?

"Bitter-sweet memories, that is all I'm taking with me;
So good-bye, please don't cry;
We both know, I'm not what you need."

Even though yeah, I still love you and pray God saves you; even if He has to take me out of the way to do it.    

So here I suppose is really the conclusion of this post: what else could I say?

"Letting go; there's nothing in the way now.
Letting go.
She's had (9) years, to get ready for this day;
She should be past the tears, but she cries some anyways."

Oh, oh Letting go.